March of the Emo Pup

...or maybe February of the emo pup?

"Emo pup" is what B calls me when I'm being mopey. This is really the only context in which I approve of the use of the term "emo," which is normally undefinable.

I am confronting the following issues in the life and times:
  • Drinking less. It turns out that it's really boring to drink less.
  • The prospect of most of my friends in SC moving away within the next 6 - 12 months.
  • The sneaking, sinking feeling that I may be an idiot and that I'm failing to do all of the things I'm supposed to do in my "career" right now: conference papers and article publications.
  • The interminable uphill climb of the dissertation.
The diss thing is not such a big deal. I set myself the goal of five pages a day and I usually manage to pull it off, and I just sent a draft of the introduction out to some people to look at.

The drinking / friend stuff is a stickier wicket. I fear I may have had too much fun from the ages of 19 - 29, eliminating as much sinful, wicked alcohol from the world as possible by drinking it in the company of attractive people. As B and I scale back (general principle: drinking less is healthier and we're 30+ now), I struggle to find new things to do.

The friend thing is a hazard of grad school. The siren call of "research," whatever that is, scatters people to the winds, and it becomes harder to relate to the new kids coming in each year. I have no solution for this one at the moment, either.

At least I've still got coffee. Thank god.


FOSCO said...

Maybe you can replace actual friends with internet friends. It's working for me, sort of...

Chrissy said...

Dude, quitting drinking or even cutting back on drinking requires lots of creativity. Also, the decreasing number of friends will probably only help you drink less. Or go out less, anyway. When Pancho and I quit drinking we basically only hung out with each other because we were the only people we knew that didnt drink.

It isnt easy but once you find that level you're looking for, the reward of being there (and feeling better) makes it easier to keep it going.

However, all bets are off, of course, if tragedy strikes your life. If you figure out a way to maintain during those times, PLEASE share your secret with the rest of us!

Good luck buddy.

noncoupable said...

Well, you may have noticed, I tend not to drink too much-alcohol, that is. Without coffee I just fall asleep all day. I tried to give it up several times and had no problems with addiction/headaches but I literally just fall asleep every time I sit on a couch.

But if you want to take up a better or healthier habit there's lot of room to do that. So many activities around here...

As for people and friends and grad school, well the good thing is you'll have cool places to visit and stay, right? In about two years you guys can come to Berlin and stay at my apartment for free.

Dolce Vita said...

Yeah, I'm with Fosco. The friends - and colleagues - become virtual but are essential of you want to stay in touch with reality (ditto with the alcohol vis-a-vis reality - cutting back is fine, but not quitting). And this far-flung cadre does provide you with places to stay in cool destinations, like exotic Orange County!

Dissertating is a special kind of ritualistic hazing. Funny how it caps off the grind of graduate school.