I have never been as old as I am today. Sometime in the next few years, the style of dress I invented (I call it "dapper old man") to accommodate the business casual codes of former workplaces will slide over the hump from hip and semi-ironic to simply age-appropriate. The physique and energy level are holding steady (read: skinny, tired), but I've noticed a sort of hang-dog tightness to my facial features that didn't used to be there. When I hang with my homies now, we all have that slow, deliberate movement from kitchen to back yard and back while we talk about how stupid everyone is who's more than three years younger than we are.Talking with B last night about the imminent arrival of the kid, we concluded that the third trimester is scary because the actual "going into labor" part is pretty close at hand. We're cool with it, we just need about six more months. I have always felt the same way about death, actually, that it's not that we really need to be immortal, it's just that we need to have a natural lifespan of about 250 years in order to figure things out.
But no. We will forge ahead with time flapping past like one of those stupid little picture flip-books, and pretty soon I'll be a whole new kind of sleep deprived and I'll have more important things to worry about.
4 comments:
regarding dress: your dapper old man attire is quite simply utilitarian brilliance. finis.
regarding kid: people who are okay with the labor part are lying to themselves and others. Furthermore, 6 more months may make B want to boot the kid out, ready for labor or not. Or so I've heard.
regarding sleep: I wish I could gift you x-number of hours of good sleep a week. I feel as if I do a good job of sleeping. It's something I do well. I know a few people who could use some extra hours.... you know, like some business let you donate vacation hours to people in need. I'd bashfully hold out my little hand, "here, have these. I have enough this week and you looked like you could use some." [rubs toe in dirt]
Right now, I'm inclined to say that the fatigue is all grad school. It's not a "tired" feeling as much as exhaustion that has seeped to the core. The only bright side is that it can't last (but may get worse). (I feel your pain here.)
You're in for a different kind of tired when it's caused by sleep deprivation. This can have highs (along with lows), so make sure that it comes with naps - for everyone!
I (heart) that picture.
Good points made, all around!
The picture is stolen off of homie J's Facebook...it's from the last grad party of last term, where it was discovered that he and I were once again equally fabulously attired.
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